Holden and Self Examination

Once a guy in my high school said "I'm like Holden Caulfield." This made me think less of him because he seemed to have missed the central part of Holden's character, which was that Holden would never read a book and really know that he was like that character. He doesn't really know enough about himself to feel that way. It's what makes him resonate with every teenager searching for a person to be.

He tries to speak with authority, to make generalizations, but Salinger's writing undermines him. We realize he can't practice what he preaches, that he's just as lost as everyone else. He's a terrible liar, like he says, but his lies are also obvious to the reader, like the one he describes about saying that you're going to the opera. Holden's proclivity towards lying makes him sympathetic, despite his privilege and his attempts at arrogance. Ultimately he's a kid who doesn't know what he wants to do with his life, and that's a story that familiar to many, many young people.

I always found it interesting that a lot of people that I know that like the book are unable to articulate exactly why. My theory is that deep down a lot of us have the nagging suspicion that we don't know what we want, so Holden's meandering journey for purpose hits us at home, especially when (spoilers!) he finds a purpose (albeit one that might be difficult to execute in the real world.) Despite all of Holden's posturing, he is really searching for a connection that he can feel safe in, but he never knows what he's looking for. That's not usually a feeling you would confess to.

So I'm calling you on your phoniness, dude from high school. If you were like Holden, you'd be ashamed. Or maybe not. Maybe that level of self examination is exactly right. I wonder where that dude is. I hope he found his carousel.